Moving on to Surgery

Mike's appt was this morning. Dr. has decided that he wants to do surgery. His 2nd SA came back the same as the first-none. Hormones were fine. So the dr. has decided that he wants to go ahead with surgery. He'll do a biopsy right away to find out if there are even any sperm present-if not-the surgery will end there. If there are-he will see what he can do to repair the damage that was done.

The dr. thinks that basically something was cut when his hernia was repaired during his surgery when he was 2. If he can fix it-there is less than a 50% chance that we will ever conceive. But even if he does "fix" it-its up to biology to see if things are going to work.

I can handle that I guess-it's this waiting game that I absolutely hate. The dr. was honest and said that his surgery schedule is quite full and it could be a few months before he is able to get him in. A FEW MONTHS!!! WE HAVE TO WAIT MONTHS!!! I almost fell over when Mike told me that!! Now-maybe it will be sooner-we'll find out the beginning of next week. His scheduling nurse wasn't in today-and he told him that she would call next week-but to plan on it being a few months out.

So here we sit-still not knowing where are lives are going to lead us. We were hoping for more definitive answers today. Thats what we were told at the last appt. Guess we'll stop believing that. I just want to move in one direction or another. Even if they do the surgery-and he "corrects" it....there is still less than a 50% chance. So we do take that chance...and TTC for another few years-or move on to adoption right away. UGH!! I HATE THIS!!! I hate IF, I hate the unknown. IT SUCKS!!!