Why isn't it me????

Last night Mike came home from work...........I was sitting on the couch relaxing from a long day-before I met with a bride to be about The Body Shop makeup....when he drops a ball on me....a friend of ours is Pregnant. I didn't cry-but I didn't smile either. He just looked at me and questioned why I didn't show much emotion. I just told him I didn't really want to hear that-they've only been trying for 3 months-after they were told 3 years ago she could never have kids....14 months later there son was born.......and now-number 2 is on his/her way. Why? Yes-they were trying-so yes I am very happy for her-and I don't want to sound selfish.....a BABY!! HOW EXCITING!!! But then why am I so hurt and upset about it. I saw her today and I congratulated her on her big news....inside-I was crying. Mike didn't really know how to react when I told him I didn't know what to say about it. He doesn't understand what it's like to not give him a baby. I know it takes 2 but I think a girl sometimes feels more responsible for it. When you are living in the body that is supposed to grow this child, and nurture it......you want it so much! To not have it............tears me apart.

I'm so happy for all of the expectant mothers.........I just wish I was one to.

Back to School

Well we went back to our "normal" routine this morning with Mike starting school again this morning. I know he's excited to get back into teaching-he gets kinda bored towards the end of the summer :) but there are times when I need to mentally prepare for him to go back to school.

Mike is a special ed teacher, so he sees the best and the worst situations possible. Although I know he is an absolutley amazing teacher there are times when he takes things so personally. I can't imagine being in his position-I would probably take things extremely personally as well. He has told me more than once that it's really hard for him to see parents who seem to not care, who never show for meetings, who dress there kids in the same dirty clothes they wore the day before, who dont' sent a lunch with there little one, who forget to pick them up from school.....because then he wonders-how did these people who don't care, who have openly said they never wanted kids in the first place-get so blessed to have one? It makes me wonder as well.

Life is full of questions....most of them only God has the answers to.......But sometimes I wish I was as smart as God :)

WE ARE MOVING!!!!

I CAN'T WAIT!!!

At the end of the month! Although September couldn't be any more busy I don't think. We have 4 weddings this month-we are moving...and we are getting a puppy. I think I should just throw some other huge project in the mix-just to add to my stress.

Regardless of how stressed we are going to be-I can't wait to have a house to call our own. We are very excited!! :)

It's Monday.....Ugh

We had a great weekend.......relaxed Friday night.....Saturday I had a Bachelorette Party and Sunday we had a Bar-BQ at our house for some of the teachers that Mike works with....a Back to School Tradition. It was a great time.....and then last night around 8:30 after most people had left-I realized I had to get up and come back to work today.

Most days-my job isn't so bad. When you are in Sales-you have good and bad days....but lately-it seems as though the bad have been outweighing the good. I've been hitting all of my goals given to me by upper management-they tell me how great of an asset I am to the company-but does that really mean much when you don't love your job 100%.

Such is life I guess.....maybe today is a job hunt day when I'm on my lunch break. Hmmm....something to think about!

Happy Monday!

Who I Am

I am a Wife
I am a Friend
I am a Lover
I am a Fighter
I am a Sister
I am a Christian
I am a Everything I want to be.......except for one thing.........I'm not a MOM!