Just NOT THE ONES WE WANTED....
The urologist called today. MUCH earlier then we were expecting. But the results were not what we were hoping for. Mike has Azoospermia. It is definite. He is completely sterile.
I guess I don't really know what to feel. I'm worried about Mike. He's obviously devestated....we both are. But I think in a way-God has been preparing me for this. Giving me the strength to know the path that we need to go down. But it seems so surreal to me to know that I will never be pregnant...and carry a child and give birth. How does one wrap there mind around that? I can't! But I think in a way thats a good thing. Because in a way-I don't know what I'm missing-because I've never been pregnant. But of course I've always longed to be-what woman doesn't? (well none that I know.) So I guess in the grand scheme of things...I'm doing OK....Not great....but OK.
We'll get through this.....we know we will. But it's still hard...it will be for a long time. But now the path we must go down is clear. We'll just take it a step at a time....and we'll get to our baby.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
10 comments:
I'm so sorry. It's so hard when you realize you won't have a baby the traditional way, but that doesn't mean you won't have a family. You will have a child or children one way or another and you guys will be wonderful parents. ((HUGS))
I'm so sorry. I'm thinking of you both.
I'm so sorry.
You asked, what woman doesn't want to be pregnant? In all honesty I want to be a mom, but I can give or take pregnancy. It's my husband who wants me to be pregnant. Even though we have to use a donor.
I admire your strength and will keep you both in my thoughts.
I'm so sorry for your news. We got that same sad news about 4 years ago after my husband had surgery. We both cried so hard, and clung to each other. Then 2 years later we were blessed with our daughter through adoption and we wouldn't have wanted to create our family any other way. God certainly works in mysterious ways and He gives us challenges we often don't understand. Just know that He has a plan for you. HUGS to you and your husband.
Im so sorry, Erin...please know I am thinking of you all and praying for peace as you move forward.
I'm so so sorry Erin. I know this is not what you were wanting to hear. But at least this closes that door completely for you, so you don't have any limbo about what you should do next. I know that giving up the idea of being pregnant is really hard; in fact, I think mourning the loss of that is very normal. Give yourself plenty of time to really absorb and feel through that loss and then you'll be ready for whatever steps you decide to take next.
And I agree with what littlezen said. Being pregnant would have wonderful, but more than anything, I just want to be a mom. And thankfully, the two are not mutually exclusive. Being pregnant is just the cherry on top. Being a mom is the cake and the icing and the sprinkles and everything else.
Erin, I am so sorry. Iknow this isn't the news you would want to hear. But I admire your strength. You will have days of complete despair, and days of strenghth. I am so sorry, you know I am here for you.
((HUGS)) I'm so sorry about the results. It's not anything anyone wants to hear, but it gives you a more definite path to parenthood. It's not the way you imagined and it does take time to grieve that loss and the dream of being pregnant. I loved how you ended the post, because you WILL get to your baby and you'll reach your goal of being parents.
I'm really sorry to hear this news. My thoughts are with you and your husband.
Post a Comment