Wednesday, July 21, 2010

2 Years Ago Today....

I've been thinking about how to continue this blog-and if I even would continue it after we met our beautiful little boy. It's purpose when I started was to get "down on paper" all that I was feeling when it came to our struggle to build our family. Now that our beautiful little boy is in our life-it seems as though the purpose is over....well maybe the original purpose. Now I think its going to take on a new roll of how we are doing as a family...now a family of 3 (and 2 furry family members as well.)

Yesterday when I was talking on the phone to a sweet friend of mine who is pregnant with her first...we were talking about infertility a bit and how I tried my hardest to not let it take over my life. I tried to continue my life as normal-or as normal as it could be. To me infertility wasn't going to win. I would be a mom-I knew that was God's plan for me-just how was going to be a little bit different. While we were talking I was thinking back about the day Mike and I found out we would never have a biological child of our own. (Please note-as Oprah once said-"Biology is the least of which makes you a mother.") I was remembering that day and how it was filled with so much sadness-and then it popped into my head-it was 2 years ago-to the date that we had found out about our infertility. At that moment I looked down at my beautiful little boy who was sleeping in my arms and I told her-that none of what I went through mattered because of how blessed we are with Jeremiah. I would go through all of those feelings again in a heartbeat to get him. The hurt, the anger, frustration, confusion, emptiness-all of it-WORTH IT! He is by far the best thing that has ever happened to us.

2 years ago today-I thought our lives were over....but in reality that was God's way of closing a chapter in our lives and starting a new one. A new chapter on adoption-one that is going to be open for a long time-as we continue to build our family this way.

So-as I remember that day-I do feel a bit of sadness in my heart because I remember how much sadness we felt-but then I look at it and tell God thank you...without that day-we would never have been given the most amazing gift of all....our son.

19 comments:

Nutty Mom said...

Are you still blogging? How are things going?

I've been dying to hear the rest of your story, and see pictures!!!

Hope and pray all is well.

--A long time reader from Tx

Just_because_today said...

Found your blog by accident. I enjoyed your post. I agree with you and Oprah, biology does not make you a mother, it is the hours you will spend with your little boy, the
Love you give him and the life you devote to him.

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