Jeremiah Paul....Part III

I'm sorry-life is crazy busy right now...but here is the final excerpt to Jeremiah's "entrance" into our lives.

We were driving to Florida-it was about a 5 hour drive from where he had flown into. Traffic was horrible...and all I could think about was why weren't we called and is this a sign of what is to come-i.e BM will change her mind. Eventually around 9:00 after we had been in the car for a few hours and I realized that we weren't going to get to FL until about 1:00 am if not a little later-I called J. I asked her what we were supposed to do...go right to the hospital-or wait until morning. Of course I wanted to go-but we hadn't met "E" yet-and I didn't know if Jeremiah would be in the room with her or in the nursery or what. She said to wait until morning-that E's social worker would meet us there first thing. Ok....so we drove...the LONGEST drive EVER. We got to our hotel in FL at about 1:30 in the morning...unpacked a bit....and crashed. I was surprised-I slept-but I did-hard. I was emotionally drained...but I woke up early the next morning-waited for E's social worker to call me.

She called and said she would meet us at the hospital at 10:00...perfect...Mike and I got to the hospital a bit before we had picked up a bouquet of flowers for E and we waited....and waited..and waited...and her social worker walked in at 10:45!!! 45 minutes late-and acted like it wasn't a big deal!!! UM-WE ARE MEETING OUR SON...COULD YOU AT LEAST TRY AND BE ON TIME!!! (I didn't say it-but wanted to). She gave me some crazy excuse and we got in the elevator. We got to the L&D suites. My heart was pounding. Jeremiah was in the room with "E". "L"-the social worker turned to us and said-as much as this is emotional-focus on "E" not you or the baby. Ok-don't misunderstand-I know this is about her...but I'm about to meet my son for the first time-and you are telling me to not focus on that...WHAT!?!!? UGH! So in we went....E was in bed watching TV and Jeremiah was sleeping in his bassinet.

We looked at "E" and my eyes started to fill with tears. I didn't know what to say-or how to act. We had talked on the phone many many times-but seeing her was different. "E" picked up Jeremiah-and held him for a few minutes....I didn't ask to hold him-I wanted her to give him to me when she was ready. She started talking to us...and after a few minutes-it was like we had known her forever. "L" was there for a bit-and "E" handed Jeremiah to "L" who then handed him to me....and I immediately started crying. I looked down at this beautiful baby boy and couldn't believe that he was finally here. I remember asking "E" if I could take his hat off...and she looked at me and said "hun-he's your baby...you can do whatever you want!" I took off his little hat-and there in front of me was thick black curly hair....LOTS OF HAIR!!! I couldn't believe it! I just stared at him....he eventually woke up a bit and just stared at me. After a bit I handed him to Mike-who of course started crying as well...he was holding his son....the one he had waited for for SO LONG.

After a bit-"E" went for a walk around the hospital and left us alone with Jeremiah...and then the tears started flowing. I cried and cried and just held that little boy in my arms and just told him how much I loved him. He looked at me with his big brown eyes and I said...."I'm your mommy." The amount of love I had for him was unbelievable. I didn't know it was possible to love someone SO MUCH SO FAST!! But I did.

We got to spend the entire day with "E" in the hospital. Talking with her-getting to know her better-taking lots and lots of pictures with her and Jeremiah together. It was so wonderful to spend that time with her. We talked about her other children and her family. She is so amazing! I love her so much!!!

After her social worker left...the entire story about her L&D came out. Here's a brief summary:

Friday night-her contractions started-about every 45 minutes apart. Nothing to be to excited about. She went to bed-woke up on Saturday-they were about every 20-30 minutes apart-again nothing to exciting. She had called her SW on Friday to let her know that she was having contractions because in case anything happened during the night-her SW had agreed to come and pick her up and drive her to the hospital. Sat. morning she called and told her SW that they were 20-30 minutes apart-and she would keep her posted-if they got any closer throughout the day. At 2:00 on the dot-they hit every 5 minutes....so she knew it was time. She called her SW to ask her to come get her-and her SW told her to call her dr. "E" was pissed. She knew it was time to go-and her SW said she had stuff going on-so that she should call her dr. to make sure he wanted her to come in right away. ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!!!!!!! UGH!! I'm fuming as she's telling me this. (Mind you...we still haven't been called or told she is having contractions-even though-"E" wanted me there for L&D)

E gets ahold of her dr. her dr. says YES-COME IN-NOW! (Her previous labor was 5 hours...so he knew she didn't have much time.) By this time its shortly before 3:00. She calls her social worker 5 times....and SHE DOESN'T ANSWER!!! WHO DOES THAT?!?! So at 4:00 she calls a cab. "E" gets in the cab-gets to the hospital at 4:20 and Jeremiah was born at 4:32. Yes-he was a stoplight away from being born in a cab! "E" social worker didn't even get to the hospital unti 6:45 that night-Jeremiah was 2 hours old. So not only did she take a cab to the hospital...but she was lone during Delivery. BROKE MY HEART-and let me tell you-I WAS NOT HAPPY! "E" had called her oldest daughter to tell her that he had been born-around 5:30. Hence why when I called her house-we were told he had already been born. When we got the call from "J" that he had been born-that was because her social worker had just gotten to the hospital and confirmed that-yes indeed he was here. She told us all of that after her SW left. My mind was racing and I was so irritated. They made her feel like she was nothing and not important! I was NOT IMPRESSED AT ALL.
Fast forward...

After we were there most of the day-we told her we were going to let her get some rest and I wanted her to spend time with Jeremiah. I wanted her to take the time she needed with him. She had told me that hindsight-since I wasn't there for the delivery-it was kind of good for her because she was able to spend the night with him and tell him everything she needed to say. She said she knew he didn't understand-but it gave her peace. So for that-I'm grateful. God works in mysterious ways-and he knew what "E" needed-and so he provided her with that time. Am I said I missed the birth of my son-Absolutely-but am I grateful that she got that time with him-DEFINITELY. I wouldn't take that time away from her at all.

We left around 4:30-and we told her we would come back around 6:30 and bring her dinner. By this time our SW and the director of the agency had called and said they were going to be there at 8:00. (That was after they were supposed to be there at 2:00 and called at 4:15 and said they were coming at 8:00 instead.) So we left-went and did some shopping for food for the week and went back to the hotel...made a few phone calls. We went back to the hospital around 6:30-and "E" decided what she wanted for supper. Mike went to get it and "E" and I got some time together. It was really nice-we talked a lot-and she kept telling me how grateful she was for us. (SERIOUSLY!AMAZING!!) After a bit Mike came back and soon the Dir of the agency and our social worker came in. The dir. brought with her 13 year old son...WEIRD and he proceeded to eat most of "E" dinner...RUDE! Ugh-that was rude in and of itself...but whatever. After they left "E" said-was it weird to you-that he came with? Umm...yes-definitely.

We said our goodbyes shortly after-the dir. of the agency told us that papers would be signed at 10:00 am the next morning. So...we left after kissing our little one goodbye and hugging "E". We told her we would be back in the morning-and we could bring her breakfast-since she has stated hospital food-was terrible. We got to the hospital at 9:30..."E" had been moved. (Minor panic attack-when we get to her old room and its empty!) They directed us to her new room-we went down there and talked with her for a bit. We had about 20 minutes before they were supposed to be there to sign the papers. We talked with "E" for awhile-and told her how much we loved her and that Jeremiah was ALWAYS going to know about her and how much she loved him. We gave her the diamond necklace that we had bought her-and for the first time since we had met her-she started to cry a bit. Not much...but a little-very rarely did she show emotion-instead-she kept me strong...because she knew-my heart was breaking for her-while it was bursting for joy at the same time.

This is when the day goes down hill.....

Jeremiah hadn't been circumsized yet. The dr. had come up earlier in the morning...but couldn't do it because Mike and I weren't there to sign off on the procedure since our ins. would cover it etc. (legalities legalities.) So they told us that he would come back around noon to do it-sounds good. The nurse told "E" that even though papers were going to be signed-she could stay at the hospital until Jeremiah was discharged if she wanted...PERFECT!

10:00 rolls around...they aren't there yet....11:00...nothing....finally I call-they said they are running a little behind-but they will be there shortly. I said ok-well he is going to be circumsized shortly-and then he has to stay for 3 hours after. So "E" wants to leave the same time he does. So that would be around 3:30. Her social worker said-oh...let me call you back. Keep in mind-that knowing they were supposed to be there at 10:00 "E" couldn't have any pain killers for her pain. She calls back and tells me-that won't work-that those in the office have personal things going on-and if she wants a ride home from them-they have to come around noon and than do the papers. "E" is not happy-RIGHTFULLY SO!!! All she wanted was to leave the same time he does. She said "I came in with him-I want to leave with him." That was her one wish! So to make things easier-Mike and I decided we would just have him circumsized later in the week-at the clinic. Not ideal-but it was better for "E". (Although-I was SO PISSED AT THE AGENCY AT THIS POINT-I ALMOST LOST IT!) So we call the agency back and say-come at noon-we can do it then-and "E" is ok with that. So fine-it's settled-we'll be there at noon. "E" looks at me and says you know....this is the devil. This is supposed to be a good day for you-and a day for me that is hard-but good-because I know he is going to a good loving home. This is the devil trying to ruin our day. (AGAIN-AMAZING! She has so much love and trust for God!)

Noon comes and goes....
1....
2....
I call-no answer
3....nothing
4:00.....nothing
4:15 here they come walking through the door! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!! And they all walked in like there sh** didn't stink. They never apologized for making us wait....even though poor "E" hadn't had anything for pain since 4 am-because they were going to be there at NOON! Not to mention-we could have had Jeremiah circumsized there-but no-we rescheduled when in reality we didn't need to.

At 4:30 we were moved to separate rooms. My heart began to race. While at the time my gut was telling me she would sign....I was scared. What if she couldn't do it. What if she decided she was going to try to parent. I was shaking...sick to my stomach-ready to puke.

About 15 minutes later...Our social worker came in and said..."Congratulations." I cried...and I cried...and Cried in Mike's arms. A bit later-we signed our papers...and walked across the hall and gaver "E" a hug. Jermiah was sleeping in his bassinet peacefully. She was looking at him. I picked him up and told her that she should hold him for awhile. So she did. She held him and talked to him...I was standing next to her-and pretty soon she stood up from the bed and came over to me. She looked at him and said "You be a good boy. And always know how much I love you." Ugh...my heart broke. I just started crying and crying. I told her that he will always know how much he is loved by her and that he will ALWAYS know who you are. She hugged me and said thank you.

We packed up our things-strapped Jeremiah into his carseat..and started walking down the halls and out the door. They had "E" get into the car first...we got into our car shortly after. At about 5:30 we got back to the hotel...and I cried...I just looked at this beautiful baby boy and cried-I was a mommy. FINALLY. He was ours.

We spent the next 4 days wondering when ICPC would go through. On Friday afternoon we got the call at 4:30 that we could go home. PRAISE THE LORD!!!!! We were so excited to go home!!! Even though we had only been there a week-we were so excited. BUT...I wanted to see "E" one more time. I called her-to see how she was doing and asked if she wanted to meet for supper on Friday night-she said she really wanted to. And was glad I called. So we met for supper Friday night...took a lot more pictures...cried a bit more and we said our goodbyes.

Saturday morning we packed up the hotel and made our way out of state. Sunday we flew back and Jeremiah was greeted by a lot of family and friends. He was so loved by so many already...the little boy that we had been waiting for-was finally home.