Influenza Sucks!

Seriously-what was the point of the flu shot? I got it about a month ago-only because my dr. made me because of my asthma. She said with the flu being mainly a respiratory situation-its better to get the shot if you've got severe asthma like I do-so I got it....and now look-I'm sick with influenza....nice. Although I haven't gotten the bill yet for my visit that day for my annual and all the blood work-I'm tempted to raise hell for the charge of the shot. If I get it today-the only problem-I don't have a voice-so I can't even call. Grrr....

Adoption.....maybe...maybe not.....

Have you ever just been pulled towards something....something for your future-something that you feel so strongly about-but yet you can't figure out why exactly? Thats me......about Adoption. Since I was dating Mike and we talked about getting married and kids-I've thought about adoption and how much I would love to adopt a child one day. Its strange for me. Coming from a family of fertile myrtles I never thought we would have any trouble TTC. But now that we are the thought has been more and more on my mind. Its to the point where i wonder what he or she will look like-what the mother will look like-where they will be from......IT'S CRAZY!! Yet I feel so strongly about it.......I don't know-maybe i'm crazy and just assuming that we will never get pg on our own-and it will be our only option. But I can't help researching adoption agencies and wanting so badly to request information from them. But I know I need to wait. All in God's time....that's what I have to tell myself.....I'll know when its right...and God will tell me.
Mike is by no means against adoption. But he wants to exhaust all TTC methods first. Me-if we can't get pg on our own.....I want to jump right to adoption. :) It's crazy...sometimes I'm the more pushy one :)

Waiting????

Sometimes I wonder when/if we will ever get pg. I mean-I know one day we will have a baby-one way or another we will have a baby-just how. After reading a lot of info on a few medical websites I wonder if its time for Mike to get a SA done. He had some "issues when he was born-mainly due to him being a premie-born 6 weeks early-and weighing 3 pounds. And the more I've researched it-one of the sideeffects is low sperm count and infertility. That would explain a lot-so when should we do it. His dr. doesn't seem to think its an issue-mainly because his other testicle should take over producing sperm etc. But thats not always the case. So I'm at a loss for what to do now. Wait or find a different dr. who will do a SA??? I HATE IF!!

Is it my turn yet??

It seems like EVERYONE can get pregnant but me!! Why? My sister called me last night and told me she was pregnant. I'm thrilled for her-really I am-but she just got married 2 months ago-she wasn't trying. Mike and I have been married for almost 2 years-have been trying and get pregnant. IT'S NOT FAIR! I WANT IT TO BE MY TURN!!! I'm probably a little bitter....of course I'm thrilled for her-and being an auntie again is very exciting....but I really thought I would be a mom before I was an aunt again.

Maybe some day.....MAYBE....

Infertility....What does it really mean.....

When Mike and I first got married we waited a few months-and then started trying to get pregnant. It didn't happen right away. I didn't think much of it-figured it was timing-etc. After a few more months-it really started make me think and wonder-maybe something is wrong. I went to my dr. for my annual and she said not to worry-it will happen eventually and she could find nothing wrong with me-to prevent me from getting pregnant.

As time went on-Mike and I continued temping. I knew I was ovulating..and I knew we were timing everything just right. As time went on we stopped temping. It became emotionally difficult to keep trying. I decided to use OPKs instead. That to me seemed easier. But yet still we couldn't get pregnant.

Mike went to the dr. for a full checkup. His dr. told him he was completely healthy. Nothing wrong. Mike expressed concern about me not getting pregnant. His dr. didn't want to do a SA yet. He wanted to wait a bit longer because of the fact that we hadn't been actually "trying" for as long as he felt we should be-before we did that. We've continued on our not trying but not preventing path for the last few months. I'm just starting a new job....we've moved, other things have come up-so we decided not to actively try-but most definitely not prevent.

Fast forward to 2 weeks ago. I went in for my next annual. My dr. tells me that even though we hadn't been trying-since we weren't preventing-and still not pregnant.....she was beginning to be concerned. She's referred me to a specialist for UNEXPLAINED INFERTILITY. When I read the referral form-I got sick to my stomach. It was a hard thing to read. What does that mean....unexplained infertility. I went home and showed it to Mike-he didn't really know what to say. I had a ton of bloodwork done since-nothing came back abnormal.

So where do we go from here? With my new job-came new insurance. I switched clinics to one that has a specialist. I'm hoping for answers....but now I'm absolutely terrified for what lies ahead-whatever they may be.

A New Year...New Beginnings

Well-2007 came and went and now I feel like I MUST keep up with my blogging. It's my personal journal-and a way for me to "vent" of sorts.

2008 has already brought a few changes to my life. I quit my job at the radio station....best move I think I could have ever made. I'm now working for my almamater doing fundraising...so far-I'M LOVING IT!!! It's so much easier to get up for work when you look forward to actually going.

I'm hoping 2008 will bring many more exciting changes to our life. A new house....a must.....a baby.....a hope.

Until next time....